by Debbie King, Inc. Magazine, 2/4/21.
…start by noticing how you feel. When you’re feeling frustrated or overwhelmed, ask yourself these questions:
1. Why am I choosing to feel this way?
This question makes clear that how you feel is a choice. It creates an opening for change…
2. How do I want to feel?
Asking how you want to feel can jolt you into awareness that you have a choice. If you’re frustrated because you or someone else missed a deadline, you may feel justified because you’re thinking, “This will damage our relationship with the manager or client.” But it’s this thought that creates the feeling of frustration, not the person…
3. What am I making this mean?
This question helps you see that you’re the one assigning meaning to every situation and it’s up to you to decide what that meaning is. For example, if an employee quits, you could make it mean “I’m not a good leader.” But does it serve you to think that?..
4. What else could this mean?
The primitive part of the brain is quick to imagine the worst-case scenario in order to keep you safe, but its judgment is often wrong. This question helps you imagine other possibilities…
5. What if I did know what to do?
Asking this is especially useful when you feel overwhelmed, uncertain, or worried. For example, you lost a client, and need to make up the revenue to reach your goals…
6. Where else does this happen in my life?
This question will help you find patterns in your instruction manual. The brain develops patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting that lead to similar results and point to core beliefs, like “I’m not good enough,” or “Leaders must always be right.”..
7. What would the best version of me do?
This question is a great reminder that you have a choice in how you show up…
Bestselling author and mindset expert Debbie King is the founder of Loving Your Business and now teaches her proven approach to other business owners.