by Michael Schwantes, Inc. Magazine, 4/4/18
1. They put boundaries on people who make them angry…
It’s saying to yourself, “I’m not going to allow this person to push my buttons, take advantage of this situation, or disrespect my authority.” Then following through on it.
2. They get to the bottom of why they’re really angry.
Emotionally intelligent people realize the reason for their anger may run deeper than what they’re experiencing on the surface. They probe, process, do a deep dive, and ask themselves, “What’s really beneath my anger?” By stepping back and looking at root causes, you’ll soon realize that your anger is really a reaction to whatever is disturbing you,.,Then tell yourself with brutal honesty, “The real reason I’m angry is … ”
3. They respond, not react.
Chuck Swindoll once said, “The longer I live, the more convinced I become that life is 10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we respond to it.” Emotional intelligent people have the advantage because they assess a situation, get perspective, listen without judgment, and hold back from reacting head on.
4. They take a six-second pause.
Why six seconds? The chemicals of emotion inside our brains and bodies usually last about six seconds. During a heated exchange, if we can pause for a short moment, the flood of chemicals being produced slows down…
5. They are the first to reach out after an argument.
6. They shift to the positive…
Have a gratitude meditation. Take out a piece of paper and spend two minutes making a list of all the things you’re grateful for in the last 24 hours. Positive psychologist Shaw Achor says if you do this simple exercise for 21 straight days, you’ll be training your brain to scan for positives instead of negatives.
Read more at … https://www.inc.com/marcel-schwantes/6-mental-habits-of-people-who-manage-their-emotions-remarkably-well.html